I feel like that lost student about to graduate, having to make a tough decision, yet not knowing what to do with her life. I thought by 21 I would have a good idea or at least a start to my life. This isn’t to say that my year abroad hasn’t been a start of my journey but more of a growing and learning experience. Sadly nothing lasts forever as I’m finding with each passing day is closer to the end of this adventure.
I’m excited to be free again to make the next step whatever that may be , but it’s almost scary not having an plan for what adventures lies ahead. I struggle with decisions; I always have, especially when faced with endless opportunities.
find a different job…
no matter what path I choose, there’s always going to the thought of which one is the best. I’m constantly reminding myself that what will be, will be with whatever choice I make in the end as there is never a perfect solution
We all have a story which is created by our choices. Choices that we may often regret but that lead to the next chapter of our life.
I want to look back on this chapter without any regrets. The question than becomes when does this chapter end; or will it ever?
Better yet, do i really want it to?
I’ve never felt more at peace with the freedom and ability to travel so easily and I’ve been taught that when we find happiness, ultimately we should try to stay in that place for as long as possible. It’s inevitable that I must move on at some point or another and often I struggle with when that point will be on a daily basis.
I have moments when I want to quit and go back to that sense of comfort at home but i’m not a quitter; I’m a fighter.
In the wise words of my mother that daily pass through my head
Life is not perfect.
I have four months left here in this beautiful country with my host family, who has grown to be not only the people who I live with, but a real family. My heart tells me I’m not ready to leave. This feeling narrowed my options down to a slim few which lead to my decision to create a workaway account on the whim one night at midnight. I paid the annual fee, therefore leading me to believe this is what I truly want to do. As with my nutrition school and deciding within one day to enroll following the payment of the tuition, I knew that staying in Europe is what my heart wanted to do.
I’ve gone 21 years following my head; focusing on the most logical decision and now, i’m just allowing life to figure out its own path for me, whatever that may be and wherever it may take me.
The beauty of this city never seizes to amaze me